Seventeen Fireflies
by ThisIsReallyHappening
Summary: Eventually, you learn to stop counting. Rated M. ExB. Dark themes.
1. Chapter 1

**Seventeen Fireflies**

_Eventually, you learn to stop counting. Rated M. Dark themes. Angst. ExB._

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Chapter One

It's never occurred to me how fireflies light up the sky at night. Sure, they're beautiful, but isn't everything when the world is dark? It's almost as if they choose an exact moment in time to illuminate my surroundings when no light exists. I wouldn't call it plotting, but do they know? Are they sure this will be the last time I enjoy them, the last time I will smile at their brightness?

They know, this I'm positive of. If I could look back, and alter my actions, I would have stepped off of Dad's old, rickety porch. I would have gone inside like he asked me to, instead of sneaking a smoke on the step that barely held my weight. I would have washed the dishes and scrubbed the burnt spaghetti from the bottom of the pot. I would have stopped and asked Dad if he wanted a drink, even though he held a bottle of Corona in his hand. Most of all, I would have kissed his cheek. He would've laughed, pretended to wipe off my slobber, and asked for another.

But in life, there are no do-overs.

Just the haunting image of Edward Cullen running towards me, his white shirt torn and bloodied to hell.

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	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

"Edward!"

He's racing toward me, full speed ahead, and by the time he reaches me, his hand covers my mouth. It tastes like dirt and clotted blood, all swirled together in some concoction that's bitter on my tongue.

He grabs my arm with his free hand, and I want to scream, because it's painful, but I can't. I realize the irony of it; of how often I wanted him to touch me, like any 17 year-old girl, but this isn't what I had in mind. I do what any best friend would do, and comply. You take a blood-oath using Kool-Aid when you're barely out of first grade and it's with you for life.

He drags me to the edge of the house, next to the wilted daises and weeds Dad has yet to cut. They scratch against my leg as the fireflies dance away. Traitors.

"They're coming for me, Bella!" He's gasping, so out of breath and all I want to do is spare him my oxygen. I'd give whatever I could to him, just to see him not be like _this. _'Cause I can't handle the way he's looking at me. Eyes of emerald have turned to pitch black and fear. I don't know this Edward.

It scares me in the most tormenting way.

"Who?" I ask. "Who's coming for you?"

I already know the answer, but when he says it, I hate him already. Just for confirming my worst thoughts.

"Everyone."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

If I had any doubt about what Edward was talking about, my Dad answers my question. He comes jogging from the house, tripping over a loose nail, yelling as he approaches his car.

"Bella?" My name is shouted in the vastness area of our house. "Damn it, Bella. Where are you?"

Edward shakes his head, and even though it's dark, I know not to answer.

"I've got a call out at the station. I'll be back soon. Just lock the door behind you!"

We take two steps back into the shadows as Dad blares his police lights on. He peels out of the driveway, rocks and dirt flying into the air in silent protest.

I swallow the lump in my throat. This is bad. There is no other word for it. I'm not capable of forming complete thoughts. I want to know everything and nothing at all.

Edward doesn't give me a choice. He never asked me if he wanted to change my life. He never questioned if I wanted to leave all that I knew and loved, just for him.

It would always be him. That I was absolutely sure of. But time to contemplate my decision would have been appreciated.

"I did it, Bella. I finally did it."

His shoulders slump in the most awkward way. Relief. Liberation. Freedom.

I swat at a mosquito that has decided I'm worthy of tasting. "Did what, Edward?"

I am nonchalant about the entire situation. It bothers him. He stops me from thwacking another tender spot and grabs me by the shoulders.

"I killed him."

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**Not everything is as it appears...**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

**Flashback:**

"Alice! This way! Kick the ball! Alice!"

My screams are to no avail. Barely reaching five feet and thin, the girl should be a powerhouse for the game of soccer. Instead, she's awkward, fumbling around, and attempting to pick flowers from the ground. I've got members of the opposite team on my back, trying to block any of my movements.

"Alice!"

I wave my hands in the air like an idiot. I know she hears me. The second we get back to the locker room, I'm kicking her ass. Four games in the season and we've lost them all.

"Al-" Some girl from our opposing school, the Seattle Rockets, knocks me to the ground. She's almost 200 pounds and has the shoulders of a football player. No way she's from the States. I plan on having a polite talk with the referees about illegal players.

A Rocket steals the ball from a dancing Alice, kicks it into the goal and the referee blows the whistle.

Game over. Six to zero.

The opposing crowd cheered as Alice skips over to me. "Look, Bella. A four-leaf clover! Can you believe my luck?"

I wipe the sweat from my brow and glare. "Damn it, Alice! Why weren't you listening to me? You had the ball right there! All you had to do was kick it!"

She looks hurt by my accusations, but I can't find it within me to care.

"But my clover!" She pouts, and I storm off, ranting as I go.

"Why are you even on the team? You're killing me, Smalls."

"It looks great on my college application. Besides, Coach said as long as I stayed out of the way, I could remain on the team. So that's what I was doing."

Grabbing a towel from the bench, I wipe my face dry and grab the nearest bottle. The Gatorade quenches my thirst, but I'm still pissed.

"Oh, look. Your boyfriend is coming!"

I don't even try to correct her, or anybody else for that matter. I already know it's Edward walking this way. Our relationship is simple, and I prefer it that way. Teenagers are always trying to label something, like they can't understand why we're best friends. We just are.

"What's wrong with his eye?"

I immediately drop my drink and glance up. Edward's right eye is completely blackened and he's walking with a limp.

"Edward?"

"I'm gonna do it, Bella. One day, I'm gonna do it and that motherfucker will be sorry he ever laid a hand on me."

I don't even try to comfort him with reassurance or kind words. Instead, I grab handfuls of ice from the cooler and wrap it in my sweaty towel, placing it on his face.

Looking back, I should have said something.

That ice was just a Band-Aid on a gaping wound.

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**Edward has a story to tell. This isn't it.**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

The evidence is in front of my face, yet I don't believe him. This is _Edward_ I'm standing in front of. Sweet, kind, generous, always-shares-his-cupcakes Edward. The Edward who always brought me chicken noodle soup when I was sick. The Edward who stayed up late, watching forbidden channels with me, like HBO and laughing at the cheesy porn.

My Edward. My best friend that I love and would do anything for.

"No. You didn't do anything. This is a bad dream. No, a prank. You're playing a prank on me, right? Well done, Edward. The ketchup, the ripped shirt. I get it. Ha. Ha. Now go home before we both get into trouble. This isn't funny anymore."

"I'm not joking, Bella." The dazzle from his eyes I so preciously adore is missing. It's replaced by something sinister, something lost.

He entangles his fingers with mine, pulling me towards the house. Inside. Through the living room. Past the kitchen. Up the stairs. Into my room.

My duffle bag I reserve for away games is placed on my bed. He moves around me in a blur, yanking clothes from the closet. I don't even protest when he opens my underwear drawer, snatching several days' worth of underclothes and tossing them toward me.

"Bella, don't just stand there! You have to hurry. They're gonna come looking for me, and where's the first place you think they'll search, huh?"

I remain immobile, and suddenly, my mosquito bite itches more than ever. I can't even focus anymore.

Edward races to my bathroom, and reappears, toiletries in hand. He stuffs them all into the bag, finally zipping it close.

When I have yet to blink, Edward stands in front of me, attempting to shake me out of my temporary daze.

"Gill? I need you. Please."

Edward hasn't called me that nickname since I was 13. He caught me shaving my legs for the first time, and the entire year of seventh grade, he tortured me endlessly.

'_Gillette, the best a man can get!_' he used to tease.

It was the same thing all over again, except this time, he was using it against me.

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**I'm usually known for the funny, but I'll write more if you like.**

**Thank you for reading.**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

The night is deceiving.

Shadows twist, portraying a serenity that fabricates only within the minds of those who believed.

Edward sprints in front of me, grasping my hand so I don't stumble in the unknown. The thump of my duffle bag bangs against my leg. I'm doing my best to keep up, and despite my athletic nature, Edward on the run is a force to be reckoned with.

"Slow down!" I whisper into the darkness.

My plea causes him to pick up the pace. We're sweeping through the open field, past my father's house, and through Old Man Alred's cow pasture. The animals are anything but pleased that we're on their territory, but they ignore us on this night. It's contradictory from our previous adventure, when we tried to tip them over.

Note to self: no matter how much cash you put into a wager, tipping a cow over is impossible.

As we race through the trees, rivaling the moonlight, I stop wondering the exact locale of our destination. There's an old barn around here. After you take a left on Hacktown Road, go past Creekton's Market, and cross the fallen bridge. The fence on the right takes you straight to it. Edward and I spent many summer days frolicking in the disease infested waters, catching frogs brave enough to wander too close.

"Almost there, Bella!" Edward huffs. "Keep running!"

He says it as if I have an alternative. Like I wasn't already submerged in his world of deceit and treachery. Like my legs weren't already searing in pain. Like my heart hadn't already pulsated a thousand and one beats-all for him.

In the distance, I see an old, rusty-colored Chevy parked adjacent to the barn. It stands out, almost knowing that it doesn't belong. I want to question where Edward had even found this vehicle, but it is the least of his problems.

_Our_ problems.

When we finally reach the clearing, Edward heaves on the eroded door, propelling my duffle bag inside.

As he shoves me to the passenger side and hotwires the truck, I observe his navy blue bag beside my own.

It occurs to me that tonight was not circumstantial.

Edward has been planning this for a very long time.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Intervals are lost as we drive for an inconceivable amount of time. I berate myself for not grabbing my cell phone from the dresser.

We stop for gas twice, once for Edward to change his bloodied clothes and dispose of the evidence. Edward makes certain I am fed with the luxuries of convenience food. The truck gives out insufficient blasts of heat, a comfort bestowed upon by the free arm and warmth of Edward.

There are words to be said, stories to be explained, but nothing is volunteered. The sunrise peeks over the horizon, taunting its break through the trees. I'm in misery over the anguish I must be causing my Dad. Unequivocally, he must know I'm gone by now.

_Does he think I'm missing? Does he think I ran away? Has he linked together the puzzle that I'm with Edward_?

The road we turn onto becomes gravel, each bump protesting our arrival. It resents us every few feet, attempting to thwart us from its path. I hang on to my deteriorating seatbelt, clutching on so tightly it leaves an impression in my hands.

Hidden deeply into the trees stands some sort of structure. The closer we arrive, the more I see just how run down it is.

The cabined roof slants and determined shingles hang on to their last nail. The porch is rotten, eaten by termites in another lifetime. Of the two windows in my view, both panes are cracked, signaling years of abuse.

As Edward parks behind two enormous trees, I turn to him, demanding an explanation.

When we were five, I took the fall for letting Mrs. Weber's puppy out the back door.

At age seven, I said nothing when Edward pushed Mike off the swing set, all because he yanked my pigtails.

Even three months ago, I lied, claiming Edward actually was in Biology class and Mr. Banner really should retire, because if he couldn't see Edward sitting right beside me, then obviously he wasn't fit for teaching.

I unbuckle my seatbelt but sit rigidly. I don't have to say anything. Edward already knows I'm not budging until he starts talking.

"In the house, Bella. You're going to need a cigarette for this."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

**Flashback:**

It's after school, and I'm drowning my sorrows in a jug of orange juice. If I don't pass this algebra class my junior year, I'm going to have to take it next year, which means I won't graduate. Forks High is hardcore like that.

The numbers are blurring together, and while I want to blame the OJ for its intoxication, I know it's my brain claiming defeat. I have half a mind to call Alice over to do my homework for me, but then I think of the words that spew from her mouth like vomit.

I'd rather fail. Her incessant talking isn't worth it.

I hear the front door open as I rummage through the fridge. There's nothing in here but stale beef stew Dad never finished. I contemplate removing the mold as I pull it from its frigid death.

"Come in, Edward! I'm in the kitchen."

I know his footsteps like my own, but these are quieter; inaudible to anyone else who wasn't named Bella.

The shoes don't squeak as loud. The sound of jeans rubbing together are softer than usual. The breathing is labored, lungs guarded by a barrier that doesn't exist.

"Edward?"

I turn around, but I yearn for the day I can dissipate into air.

There are people in this world that face turmoil.

Some face tragedy.

Others…Well, they climb through obstacles like a fucking monkey escaping an alligator with a hard-on.

Edward was no spider-monkey.

In the entire existence of Edward Cullen, the boy had never shed a tear. He refused to cry, not even when that fat ass across the street stole his bike. Instead, I had wept for him. I had plans for that bike; dreams that included streamers and a horn and exclusive rides to the Diner.

Now, he slobbers, vomiting on the linoleum in the process. Hunched over, he says four words that shock me to my core. It vibrates through my system, creating a fusion of detachment and disbelief that burn through my soul.

_You're lying. You're lying. You're lying. _

_Not true. Don't say it again. This isn't real. _

_Why the hell are you fucking with me? Don't do that. This isn't happening. Clean up your mess._

_I can't breathe. Stand up already. Why would you say that? Why? Why? Why would you try to make me cry?_

_She's like my own. This isn't real. Take it back._

_I don't believe you. _

_You're lying. You're lying. You're lying._

"My Mom is dead."

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**Umm, I think I just left you guys hanging on a Flashback. Huh. **

**It all ties together, I promise! **

**Alright, so that's it for today! Thank you so much for reading.**

**I'd like to thank my Beta,_ MariahajilE_, for editing the crap outta this fic. :)**

**Otherwise, you all would abandon me, for sure.**

**My Other Story, The Client, is rec'd on TLS, The Lemonade Stand! Check it Out!**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Five star this is not.

It's not as if I come from riches; Dad is the sheriff in a shitty little town whose claim to fame is lumberjacking. But this…This is abysmal.

I'm expecting to find animal carcasses and red paint on the wall, a warning to anyone who finds themselves destitute enough to enter. Maybe not in the cobwebs of the living room, but I know it's here somewhere. Edward drops our bags on the worn couch, plopping down enough that dust decides to greet us with its appearance.

He points to the open space, directing my gaze to certain areas. "Kitchen. Bedroom. Bathroom. Fridge is stocked. Sorry it's dirty. I tried to clean as best as I could."

_You didn't do a very good job, now did you?_

I pat my pocket, now only realizing I have no smokes. Edward reads my body language and reaches into a bag. He pulls out a carton of Marlboro Light 100's, my girly cigarettes.

It's a dirty habit of mine, passed down from generation to generation. I only snuck around Dad because grandpa passed away from lung cancer and he didn't want me smoking. Dad still smokes cigars. Hypocrite? Yeah, that's in the genes, too.

I rip open the carton, then the pack, fumbling for the only relief that dares to give me the illusion of peace. Edward joins me, lighting up one himself before passing me the lighter.

"Bella? You remember that day? Ya know?"

_When your mom died? How could I forget? It's the day you stopped living. _"I remember."

"You recall what I said to you, after I explained about the car crash?"

"Ummm…" I wrack my brain, trying to decipher through some hidden code Edward refuses to come right out and admit. "You said Esme picked you up from football practice. You guys were driving home, but she decided she needed to stop at the grocery store for some milk. To make Mrs. Cope some casserole because she was sick."

"Keep going."

"And then," I pause, the words of that day blurred together for me just as it must have for him. "And then you said she made a U-turn, but this truck came out of nowhere. It hit Esme's side, but it pinned you against the pole…Edward, this isn't solving anything."

I don't want to rehash the most painful moment of his entire existence.

"Bella, get your shit together. You want to know why we're here? You want to know why I'm a wanted man? You want to know why I haven't slept in over a fucking year? Then answer the damn question!"


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

I tremble at Edward's acidic tone. He's close to me, barking in my ear, breathing in the same precious air I don't want to share. I didn't consent to this.

"You," I swallow, a lump forming in my throat. "You said Grisley Road was empty. That there were no other travelers. You couldn't make out the vehicle…I don't know, Edward!"

My eyes flutter with tears, each with its own bitter flavor of salt.

"I saw him, Bella. I told you that. No one else. Not even the investigators. No one. But I told you. I saw the driver."

I don't remember. Maybe because anything Edward mumbled from that day forward scorched my skin like fire; harsh, straining, incoherent phrases that never made any sort of sense.

"Who was it, Edward?"

"It's the same person who's been beating the fuck out of me for the past 326 days, making sure I keep my mouth shut."

I gasp, resisting the notion to admit the secret I held within for so long.

_Carlisle._

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**To MariahajilE- I think you only BETA to get sneak peeks. I'm okay with that.**

**My wonderful readers/reviewers- Um, I don't know what everyone is on, but your response is ridiculous. TY! I'm honored.**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

The sweat trickles down my collarbone, dangerously close to slipping in between my breasts before Edward stops it with the pad of his thumb.

He holds the drop on his finger, admiring the myriad of colors reflected within its pool. He studies it, and I feel bare, as if he's scrutinizing _me_.

"I'm going to get us out of this, Bella. I promise." I'm unsure, wondering how in the world he could possibly save us. The Superman cape had long disappeared, buried with the remains of his mother.

Edward pulls my chin, twisting my face so that my gaze has nowhere else to turn. "I've got money, Bella. Fuckin' loads of it. We're protected. No one will find us here. All that matters is that you're safe with me. I couldn't have that fucker come after you next. I had no other choice. You're safe with me. You know that, don't you?"

I gaze at him, my eyes untrusting of his insecure promises.

"Damn it, Bella!" Edward slams his hand onto the rickety coffee table, causing an old wooden bowl to spin before ricocheting to the hardwood floor. "Don't you even understand what's going on here? You think I've brought you here to die? You think I pulled you out of everything you've ever known and loved just to let you sit and rot?"

"Gilly, I'm fucking weak. I'm weak and I'm vulnerable and the only reason I'm in this shit is because Mom couldn't take her ass straight home like she was supposed to. I'm in this shit, because every time you tried to pull me in, I blocked you out. I blocked you out, intent on staying in a locked cage, treating you no different than the rest of those fuckers out there.

"You aren't them, Gill." Edward falls on his knees, propping his body in between mine. He caresses my cheeks, his touch as soft as his words. "You're different. You're this glass vase I keep up high on the shelf where no one else can reach you. You're fragile, beautiful, my fucking world, and I'll be damned if anyone takes you away from me. You're precious to me, and I don't care if you splinter my heart into a thousand pieces. I'll keep coming back. This shit right here, this pain I'm going through, it's damn hard. But losing you would be a tragedy.

"Don't make me go through this alone."

His whimper breaks his shield of armor, and I lean forward, catching his soul from descending into the depths of forever.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

"I won't."

It's a humble statement of truth, me sacrificing all that I am to be with the person who needs me the most. I don't know what this means, how this will change us. I'm a traitor to my father but never to Edward. This boy, so quickly matured into a man by tragic circumstances, doesn't need me assaulting his decisions. It's too late now. All I can do is weather the storm with him.

I run my fingers through his chaotic hair. He's tired and drained; tired from the running, weary from the driving, exhausted from being hidden in a world that demands your translucence.

Edward murmurs something imperceptible as I stroke his hair.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Sleep with me, Bella."

My hands freeze, unsure if I heard him correctly.

That laugh I once knew so well, bubbles from Edward, the sound gurgling from being buried for so long.

"Silly girl." Edward rises, kissing me gently on my forehead. "I'm beat. Come lie with me."

I nod, my legs betraying me as I attempt to stand. Edward holds my hand, and though we've spent countless nights curled up around one another, this feels different. It's unfamiliar, as if I'm treading ground no one has ever traveled upon. He leads me to a room that's as neglected as the rest of the house, but the sheets on the small bed at least look new.

There's an antique dresser and one nightstand with an old-style lamp on the right of the bed. We both sit down, removing our shoes. Edward pulls back the comforter. I lay back, with Edward wrapping his arms around me. He pulls me closer, using me as his refuge.

He breathes on the side of my neck, leaving me shivering. I trace the form of his hand as he steadily exhales. Youth should be shown in the lines of his skin. Instead, it reflects labor and pain, as if an artist had abandoned his unfinished canvas in the midst of creating a masterpiece.

"Edward?" I whisper his name, my voice barely peaking above the silence.

"Hmm?"

"You know the truck you drove us here in?"

"Yeah."

"I think I remember that truck. From long ago. It's been awhile, but it just seems so familiar."

Edward's breathing halts at my observation. For the life of me, I can't understand why the origin of that stupid hunk of rust is so important to me. I'd ridden in many trucks; some sleek, the chrome from the wheels glistened in the sun. Others were from friends, older, but reliable. But never rusted.

"Don't be insatiable for a thirst you cannot quench, Bella."

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**Has your opinion of Edward changed? **

**What do you think the truck signifies? **

**Are you all totally lost and only hanging around for the cupcakes?**

**MariahajilE: Your red edits are like skewers to my heart. And yet, I love you. **

**Readers: You all make me happy. I don't deserve you. Wait, maybe you, the one in the back, but not the rest.**


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

**Flashback (EPOV):**

"Geez, Bella, you're such an idiot. I wasn't looking up your stupid dress!"

I was, but it's only 'cause I've got a bag of Pop Rocks riding on this. Turning to Emmett, I hold my hand out. "Pay up, dude!"

Bella swings back and forth on the old tire, her pigtails flying behind her. "I hate you both. I'm telling my dad! Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddy!"

She jumps off the swing, leaping onto the ground and runs off toward her house. The sheriff hears about this, and we're both dead.

"Fuck, Edward. You couldn't have waited until she was out of sight?" Emmett's chubby hands give me the goods, his fat jaws saddened at the loss of his candy.

"Shut up, Meatball! You didn't think I would do it, did ya?" I smirk, pouring the entire package into my mouth.

I laugh at the sensation in my mouth as Sheriff Swan comes marching out of his house. "Edward Cullen! Emmett McCarty! Git your asses over here right now!"

Emmett's lard hands shove me, and we walk toward the porch, guilty as hell. His gun scares the hell out of me, and I stare at an ant climbing up my arm instead of the cold eyes awaiting me.

"Listen here, boys. If you can't show some respect to my little girl, then its best you both be headin' home. Do I make myself clear?"

Bella peeks behind her father's legs, sticking her tongue out at me and grinning. What a rat! Girls are so dumb, with their stupid faces and stupid hair braided down and their stupid yellow underwear with the flowers on it.

Stupid Bella.

We hear an engine driving nearby and Sheriff Swan looks off in the distance. "That your old man, Edward?"

I shake my head as the truck arrives closer.

"Ahhh. 1953 cherry painted Chevy. That's a classic right there, I tell ya. Git on kids. Lemme go see who this is."

We scamper off, chasing Bella behind a tree so we can pinch her on the legs for being a tattle-tale.

I would see the man jumping out of the truck again later, much later, when I least expect it.

But he was most definitely not my father.

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**Say what?!**

**MariahajilE thinks I'm giving you guise too many chapters. So here's one. Enjoy the slow burn and feel free to send her hate mail, per Twitter. **


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

**Midnight of the Killing: Forks, Washington**

"Alright, boys!" Charlie yells to the surrounding police officers. "I want everyone to comb this area within a 30-mile radius. No one comes into this town and no one goes out 'til we find that bastard. He's got my little girl and I'll be damned if he thinks he can get away with this! I want you under cellars, in the woods, and clogging your way through shit if you have to. You find my baby and you bring her back to me, now! If you see his ass, no questions asked! Shoot on sight! I repeat, shoot on sight."

Charlie presses the trigger on the bullhorn, sending reliable and competent men off in search of his only daughter and Edward. One minute, he's enjoying the game on T.V. The next, he's out digging in swamps for clues on Bella's whereabouts. As soon as he arrived at the Cullen home, he knew instantly Bella wouldn't be there when he returned. A few phone calls and a deputy visit later proved his point. His daughter would do anything for the Cullen boy, and if he lured her with lies, he knew Bella would believe him.

Charlie returns to the Cullen house, examining the body that lies below. He allows his inner instincts from being in the force take over. The crime scene is anything but clean. Blood spews from Edward's bedroom walls down to the white carpeted floors. The body itself lies almost staged, with defense wounds on his arms and multiple stabs to the torso. He'd put up a hell of a fight before Edward finally gutted him like a fish. He doesn't need a coroner to tell him this was murder. If he could label it himself, he'd call it a downright execution.

Because Edward had gone through a rough year with the loss of his mother, Charlie knew that boy was finally going to lose it. Why he killed the one person who had been there his entire life was beyond the sheriff.

A voice weeps behind Charlie.

"I'm sorry this had to happen," Charlie says apologetically. "I don't know what Edward was thinking."

"Me, either," sobs Carlisle, leaning against the doorway.

"Emmett was a good kid."

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**Ahhhh!**

**Ummm, how many of you are pounding your laptops right now? No? Just me? Okay. :(**

**MariahajilE will do anything for a muffin. I prefer cupcakes. Our love is at an impasse.**

**Thanks for reading this madness everyone. It's okay to curse at me. I expect nothing less.**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

**One Week Later:**

The question's been nagging me since I was dragged into this whole situation. It seems futile to ask now, but Edward's temperament has somewhat improved. He brushes through my hair, pulling at the knots, making sly comments about how ratty my curls are more than usual. It's an appropriate time to ask, because I won't have to look him directly in the eye.

"How did it feel? You know, to take someone's life?" _To steal the existence of someone who brought you into this world_. Edward pauses before brushing harshly, causing me to gasp in pain. _Bastard. _I can feel him eyeing me frostily, as if I didn't have the audacity to inquire such a thing.

"I don't know how to answer that Bella." He continues brushing, pretending I never said a word.

"Just… be honest."

Edward is provoked by my question, huffing, then lifting me into his lap. Since I expect another verbal explosion from him, I gauge how far I can leap to make my escape. However, he's eager to take the bait, finally unloading the secret burden from his shoulders.

"I reveled in it," he mouths in my ear. The tresses on the nape of my neck are blown softly by his breath. He intertwines his fingers with mine, rubbing his thumb against the crescent of my hand. The sensitive caresses are contradicting his ruthless act of crime. "I finally felt at peace. I felt like that son of a bitch couldn't hurt me anymore. I felt free."

Edward's lips press just below my ear. "I suppose you want me to say I feel guilty for what I've done. I know. I feel malicious for even saying these words, but sometimes you have to make the nightmares stop, Bella. When they become real and you don't even have the safety of your bed to hide in, you have to do whatever it takes to see the light again. Otherwise, you'll drown in a darkness so disturbing you won't even recognize yourself anymore."

His words chill me to the core, haunting me from within. For once, I understand his perspective. His own father killing his mother and then beating him relentlessly… He had to be callous; it was the only way to protect himself.

"You still see _me_, don't you?" Edward's fingers trail to my legs, leaving them trembling in his path.

"Of course, Edward." My words are hushed, barely heard above the hum of the refrigerator. "I would never view you differently."

"Not even now?" His smoldering expression stuns me; the juxtaposition of attraction and friendship. I can't help but gaze at his features: emerald eyes, strong jaw, stubble of facial hair; all characteristics of him that appear older than his age.

His long fingers stroke me, and I don't recognize this Edward. He's adoring me with his hands, kissing places no best friend should ever kiss. Flicking his tongue, he licks softly, breaking down barriers we never discussed approaching. I'm melting, falling into his embrace, sinking into a place he's so methodically cornered me into one. One thing about Edward: he's calculated about every aspect of his life. This should be no different.

"I don't want you to be afraid of me, Gilly," he murmurs, soothing me with his husky tone. "You're all I have left. That's a high price I've asked you to pay for, to redeem me with your love alone. See, I could succumb to this, us, right now if I truly wanted to. I could lay you back, kiss you here."

The touch travels up to my breast, making me squirm.

"Or here." I'm enflamed by the velvet caress of his voice. His hands slide to the entrance of my jeans, tickling just above where I feel a pool of dampness will expose me for my treachery.

He shifts me around, laying me on my back, hovering over me. He uses one hand for support. The other teases me, luring me to the web he's so delicately planned. He slips into my panties, palms me gently, and my hips lift on their own accord.

Edward leans over, floating his lips just above mine, pleading for a permission I'm more than willing to grant. He pulls my lips between his, the moistness gliding us through electric sparks that flicker before the fire. I inhale sharply, growing bolder in the unfamiliar but sensual sensation. Our mouths dance, performing an erotic ballet neither of us auditioned for.

"I could run forever…" I gasp as he spreads through my valley, dipping, exploring foreign land he's claiming as his own. One finger travels first, assessing, before he stretches me with a second. They curl upward, tiny circles being rubbed by his thumb.

"Through the borders, sweet Bella." I moan, my body betraying me with the worship of his mouth. The combination makes my head spin, the pleasure too much, too intense.

"Across waters…" I suck in oxygen with wild abandonment, all air being forbidden from my lungs. Edward sucks on my neck, his movements quickening. I am pushed to the edges of the earth, no rescue in sight. I shudder, rocking as my release peeks through the border.

"But with you…" I cry out, my eyes widening at the tightening in my abdomen, which unknots and then unravels at lightning speed. Edward kisses me, distracting my lips as I fall slowly, the intense feeling wrapping around an aura that glows in spectrums.

"I'm home."

I sigh, catching my breath as a familiar melody rings through the air. Edward rises quickly, fumbling through his pockets.

_He has a phone? _I frown, my bliss obliterated with rage. _How many times had I mentioned I wanted to call my dad? How many times have I cried in his arms, seeking refuge because I had no outside connection with the world?_

I reach out for his cell, snatching it out of his grasp.

"Bella! No!"

It's too late. I read the screen, the familiar picture and number blaring at me incessantly. I alter my future, answering the call.

"Hello?"

"Bella? Is that you?"

The phone drops, plummeting to the floor, as it darkens to its death.

Esme's voice sounds the same as it did before she died.

* * *

**What?! -This seems to be the only type of review I get these days. It makes me giggle and want to sneak you all my future docs. **

**MariahajilE- I fell in love with you during the 500 chapters of The War Is Over. Now you're my BETA? No matter what those other éclairs say, you'll always be my muffin. Always. **

**Check out Ana Rodfranco's (two!) new banners she made for this story on my profile! Way better than my previous crap. TY to the ends of this fandom!**


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

My cries of anguish cause me to stumble, my knee hitting the coffee table without any regard for my feelings. Refusing to wait for a response, I jerk myself out of Edward's reach, wincing as the pain shoots through my limb.

I drag my body against my will, running through the front door. I don't dare grab my scarce belongings. It is safety I seek instead. The rusted truck stands hidden but close enough within my reach. I can hear Edward panting behind me, attempting to catch me in my escape.

"Bella! Wait! Bella!"

I fumble with the corroded door, tugging on the handle with no success. Edward finally approaches me, holding his weight against the door. "Bella, don't! You have to listen!"

"Listen?" I yell, whipping strands of hair from my eyes. "Listen to what? Lies? I thought your mother was dead. Instead, she calls you as if it were any other day. You don't even seem surprised. I don't want to hear anymore! How many times have I held you, allowed you to stain your tears on the fabric of my shirt? How many times have I cried myself to sleep? And you allowed it! Telling me it would be okay? Your deceit is filthy, Edward! The grime on your soul isn't enough to protect you from the burn of Hell! Instead, it will be like fuel, feeding the blaze you will never extinguish. I hope you _revel _in that!"

My words mark Edward, each syllable tarnishing the artificial bravado he pretends to present so well. I jerk on the door again, still unable to break it from its hold.

"And to think," I continue. "I sympathized with you. Poor Carlisle. You murdered him for nothing. Fuck you, Edward. Fuck you and the blood that seeps into your hands. You deserve every ounce of torment you feel."

Edward blinks, assessing my rage. His expression turns to confusion. "My dad? Why would you think I killed my dad?"

The question is deafening to the silence of my inner monologue. I quiver, my thoughts jumbling around our previous conversation. "You said the person that's been beating you; that's who you killed. That's why we had to run away."

"Not my father, Bella. Emmett. I stabbed Emmett."

My hands shake, seizing uncontrollably at the revelation. One of my best childhood friends… Gone. I wasn't even given the courtesy to mourn his death.

Curiosity gets the best of me, taunting again with its ugly nature. "Why, Edward? Why would you murder him? He obviously didn't kill your mom in the accident. I know that now. So why? Why would you keep your mom's survival a secret? Why would you kill your best friend?"

Edward swallows, and in the distance, I hear police sirens wailing. Edward's gaze never leaves me. He grasps my hands, holding them still.

The marked cars surround us, police officers jumping out by the multitude. Their guns are drawn, ready to shoot at a moment's notice. "Raise your hands! Now! Step away from the girl and put your hands in the air!"

As Edward backs away, his whisper lingers into the air as cops run toward him to tackle him to the ground.

"He beat me, trying to hide the affair…"

* * *

**I should have just named this fic DUN DUN DUN...It's a better representation, don't cha think?**

**MariahajilE basically writes this story. I give her docs that say "bksllpibsajwkdu" and she turns it into this. Thank you, my savory little blueberry! **

**Emmett banged the missus? Oh my. Are you shocked? Startled? Totally saw it coming? **


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

"Bella, I've missed you so much! Are you hurt? Are you all right? Bella? Bella!"

Dad shakes me, torn between embracing the daughter he thought he'd lost and asking dozens of questions. Standing in the middle of the police station, I smell the whiskey on his breath, the aroma permeating his uniform. The scent is nauseating but a welcome one. I hold still, attempting to conceal Edward's phone in my pocket. I had to be quick, hiding the evidence as the policemen surveyed the house.

"Bella? Do you need to sit down? You need something to drink? Deputy, get my daughter some water."

"Dad," the sound gargles in my throat. "I'm fine. I'm fine."

I repeat it, more for myself than for him. It keeps the bile from rising, the room from spinning in circles around me. The chaos of police officers surrounding me should make me feel safe, but I feel trapped.

"How did you find us? I meant me?"

The deputy arrives with a cup of water that I refuse. Dad sits me down in the nearest chair, the wood scraping the floor. "Baby girl, I searched this area high and low. Them dang hound dogs searched through the forests for days. Suddenly, we get a call from Carlisle's brother, Felix. Says he's got an old house up in the hills. Edward used to go there from time to time. That's how we found you. Bella, I've been pulling my hair out stressed over this. He didn't hurt you, did he? I swear, when I get my hands on that piece of shit, I'm gonna-"

"Dad, I'm fine." It's become my mantra. I chant it until it becomes the truth, until it sweeps out the lies that lurk beneath a layer of tales.

"These police officers want to question you, but I told them they could kiss my ass 'cause I'm taking you home. You look like you haven't been eating. I'll cook you the juiciest steak on this side of Washington. Hold on. Let me get some paperwork finished. I'll be right back. And Bella?"

I look up, the lines on my father's face breaking my heart. "Yeah?"

"You're lucky to be alive. Just be glad we found you in time."

I nod, unsure of what I'm supposed to do with that statement. I take a drink of the warm water, noticing a cell phone on one of the cop's desk. It looks aesthetically similar to Edward's, so I quickly hide it in my pocket.

"Miss?" A female cop turns around, looking to me with eyes raised.

"Can you tell my dad I'm going to the restroom? I gotta pee real bad."

"Sure thing."

I rush off to the women's bathroom, the lone stall reeking of urine and feminine products. I lock the door behind me. Fumbling with Edward's phone, I remove the backing. Just as I suspect, the battery is cracked. I take the new one out of the officer's phone, inserting it into Edward's. I wait for the phone to start, each second ticking by making me more nervous.

Finally, the phone lights up. 17 missed calls. All from Esme.

I click on her name, the picture of her smiling makes me sick. I receive no greeting as a panicked voice answers the phone.

"Edward?"

"Edward's currently being held on murder charges. This is Bella." Though we are probably lifetimes away, the bitterness in my voice is detectable.

"Oh, Bella. I'm so glad to hear your voice. It's all over the news. I've been worried-"

I laugh without the hint of amusement. "You've been worried? _You've_ been worried? Fuck you, Esme. I watched as we buried you in the ground. Threw flowers on your coffin. Sang some sweetass bullshit as I held my best friend from dying himself, and you tell me _you_ were worried? Your son is going to get the electric chair by the time they're done with him! You need to fix this shit! Edward told me all about your little affair."

The venom in my voice is like poison, seeping through the lines, constricting her ability to lie anymore.

"Bella, I'm sorry. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. We had a plan-"

"Look how well that turned out for you!" I retort, annoyed by her explanation.

A light knock interrupts my phone call. "Bella? You alright?"

My father's voice seeks to know my condition. I attempt to calm his anxiety. "Almost done. Just washing my hands." I twist the smudged faucet to prove my point.

"Okay. I'll wait right out here for you."

I lower my voice, hissing out my last warning.

"When you died, Esme, you took the whole damn town with you, each person crying as if they had lost one of their own. You better find a way to rise from the grave and help him, Esme, or I swear on your pitiful little life you're going to wish you really were dead."

* * *

**Guess what? You get an extra today! Keep going...**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

You'd think they would get the message.

They swarmed like vultures, trying to get anything possible for me to condemn my best friend. When I don't, they turn to the neighbors. _We always knew the Cullen boy was bad news_ or _It was just a matter of time_. They didn't mention how when the Clearwaters' basement overflowed from the storm, Edward canceled his entire weekend with me just to help. Or when the Fuller's cat got stuck up a tree, Edward was the one who coaxed him down. No, they want to smear his name all over the news, portraying him as a deviant whose mother's death finally sent him over the edge.

They don't mention why the hell Emmett had climbed through Edward's window late at night when he was sleeping. They don't report the bruises all over Edward's body or why he had 13 emergency room trips in the adjacent town in a span of six months. See, people don't like searching for the truth. They'd rather believe the lie and then hang you for it.

Welcome to Forks.

I gave my statement to the police, with my Dad viewing the whole ordeal. I left out details; I didn't know how much Edward had told them. No, he didn't hurt me. No, I wasn't held hostage. No, he doesn't have a history of violence. No, I don't know where he got a bag full of money. My bland, pointless answers finally got them off my back.

My bed has an imprint of my body. I stay there for days, going through the partial bits of information I have. Emmett must have been having an affair with Esme. They staged some crazy plot for a car accident so they could be together. Edward was in the car, but something must have gone wrong. Maybe he wasn't supposed to be there in the first place. Edward saw Emmett and confronted him about it. Emmett abused Edward for a year, threatening to kill him if he opened his mouth. Somewhere along the way, Esme finally gets the balls to tell Edward the truth. Too much time had passed, and Edward got fed up with Emmett's shit. He planned to end it all one day, getting the house and truck ready. For whatever reason, Emmett snuck through Edward's window. Edward defended himself, killing him, and now the state is charging him with first degree murder.

I refuse to come out of my bedroom, and dad doesn't make me. He's torn up about Emmett's death, heartbroken, constantly going over to the McCarty home to make sure they're coping. The funeral was beautiful, or so I heard. I'm too selfish to leave my hiding place. The last thing I need is pity from everyone. My own resentment is enough to keep me alive.

Alice comes over, and even though I'm hesitant to open the door, I let her in.

"Bella," she says quietly. "You have to get out of this funk. It's been two weeks now. Edward will get through this. He's strong."

Sitting at the table staring at my uneaten sandwich, the tears fall slowly from my eyes. I despise them, the way they show my weakness.

"Maybe you should go talk to Carlisle. You two need each other. He's falling apart, just like you are."

"I don't know, Alice. Being in that house… I don't think now is a good time. It's too soon."

"You think you're suffering? Carlisle is beyond consolable. The amount of suffering he's going through is depressing. Both of his boys gone. I mean, I can only imagine-"

"Alice, what are you talking about?"

Alice quirks her eyebrow at me, as if I'm living on a planet that doesn't truly exist. "Geez, Bella, for someone that's lived in this town her whole life, you sure are a hermit. Emmett was adopted. He's actually a Cullen. Why do you think the news has been all over this?"

She sighs, patting my hunched shoulder.

"Your beloved Edward killed his own brother."

* * *

**GASP!**

**But if Em is Ed's bro...**

**And Esme is his mom...**

**That means...*vomits***

**You poor readers, you have no idea what you walked into, did you? Trust me when I say it gets worse...**

**Thanks for reading and super-duper hugs to my BETA, MariahajilE. You're the jelly to my roll, sweetums!**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

We decide to meet on the edge of town.

I drive past Mrs. Cope's yellow house, where all of the honeysuckle bushes still await little children to come by to savor its sweet nectar. I glance where we used to open the fire hydrant and dance through the cold gushes of water in the blazing sun. The concrete is still cracked, the only evidence I have of me and Alice pouring watermelon juice onto unsuspecting ants. It seems like a lifetime ago, before people started dying and faking deaths and sleeping with people half their age.

She's so thin that if I didn't know who to look for, I would've never recognized her. Lines around her eyes have appeared out of nowhere, hiding the full, beautiful smile I was so accustomed to. The blonde hair that once made her look like a movie star hangs limply around her shoulders, as if it's too weak to grow another inch.

_Bag o' bones,_ my dad used to say. It fits her to a 'T.' I suppose if she looked any healthier, I would be angrier. I prefer her this way, a ghostly image I can wrap my mind around. A skeleton frame for an empty soul.

She leans against a silver Ford, waiting for me to say the first word. Instead, I sit in the dirt, tracing my name against the grains of soil with a wilted stick.

She clears her throat, gaining the courage to speak. "It's good to see you, Bella."

"I can't say the same, faker." I start stabbing the ground, letting out my frustration on the earth. If this is how she imagined this conversation going, she's sadly mistaken. I have a lot of shit to get off my chest, none of which include pleasantries and compliments. "You've got a lot of gall calling me like this. If you aren't going to help Edward, then I think it's best you just stay dead."

Esme stares off into the distance, toward a place I can't see, somewhere where none of this is real and we just imagined the whole thing. "I don't know what you want me to do."

"Tell me the damn truth, Esme! Tell me what the hell is going on! I find out yesterday you're Emmett's mother and everybody knows but me! Start explaining, or else I'm getting out of here and telling everyone they need to start digging into your grave. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

The bees buzz around us, flying in patterns mankind would never be able to trail. It's as if they can track my bitterness through the air.

"It's a long story," she warns.

"Lucky for you, I've got time." I wait impatiently, tapping my foot against the Birchwood tree.

Esme breathes deeply, taking in the world's supply of oxygen with her.

"It all started when I was fucking your father…"

* * *

**Thanks for waiting everyone. I've been super sick this week, so I appreciate it. **

**MariahajilE- you're a beta ninja, aren't you? I knew it! Your muffin layers are crumbling, my dear.**

**In the meantime, how 'bout that Esme, huh?**

**I know you guys want pieces to start clicking together, but...**

**Nah. I like the sounds of you threatening to click the X much better. hehe. Hang in there. The thread will start to unravel. :)**

**More today? I'm feeling generous. But only if you really want it...**


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

I don't even get the opportunity to tell her what a liar she is, how her false accusations for her being a whore have nothing to do with my father, when my phone rings. It's dad, and though I hesitate to answer the call, I don't want him to worry any more than he has to.

"Hey, dad." I greet him with a cheeriness that doesn't exist, to waver any possibility that I'm not okay.

"Bella! Baby girl, git home!" His usual calm voice is replaced by a severe warning, the prelude to bad news I'm frightened to hear.

"Why? What's going on?" My eyes widen at the possibility that he's hurt or something horrible has happened.

"Edward escaped this morning. It's too dangerous to be out. We ain't got enough officers-"

I don't listen to anything else.

Edward escaped.

He's missing.

He's gone.

_He's free. _

"Bella? Bella!" Dad's voice calls out my name, but I end the call. I have to find Edward. He needs me right now. I can only imagine how scared he is, how much courage it took him to flee from his cell.

"What's the matter?" Esme asks, concern washing over her face.

"Nothing," I lie. "I have to go."

I give her zero details, the amount in gratitude returned for her actions. I race toward my car, turning the key and hightailing it out of there with dust gusting behind me.

When I glance in the rearview mirror, Esme is in the same position, unmoved and as lost as ever.

* * *

The drive through town is uneventful. I search for Edward at our usual spots with no success. It's as if I expect him to be at Goody's Ice Cream Shop, slurping on his favorite strawberry milkshake. He's not hanging at the local bowling alley or walking the football field at the high school.

"Think," I whisper to myself. "Where would Edward go if he didn't want to be found?"

The light bulb goes off above my head, and my question changes. It's not where Edward would go; it's where _I_ would go.

I make a screeching U-turn and take the left on Hacktown Road.

Past Creekton's Market.

Across the fallen bridge.

I turn off the ignition, sprinting out of my car, following the fence to our favorite pond.

Where we used to catch frogs brave enough to wander too close.

He's there, kneeled down, disheveled and dirty. The clothes on him don't fit, hanging loosely on his body like an imposter.

"Edward?"

The crooked smile, the one I adore so much, greets me. "What took you so long?"

I run to him, wrapping him in a hug and embracing the dirt and grime. My eyes squeeze shut, holding the one person in the world I can't live without. He smells like stale cigarettes, but I keep my grasp on him. Our heart beats in the same rhythm, each one reminding me he's okay.

He's okay. He's fine. He's living. Breathing. They haven't worn him down. They haven't taken _my _Edward; not his courage, or his laugh, or his smartass nature I've grown to both love and hate. They haven't taken _him_.

He finally pulls away first but entangles our hands together.

"Edward, I need answers. I don't know what's going on. How am I supposed to help if you when everyone keeps lying to me?"

Edward shifts his feet, debating on how to tell me the truth.

Or how to weave a web of lies so that it appears to be reality.

"It's Emmett, Bella," Edward breathes out. "He'd been hiding this dirty secret…"

"The affair with Esme?" I question. "I don't understand. I thought he was your brother. Why was he sleeping with your mom?"

"Geez, Gilly! Where in the hell are you getting this information? He wasn't sleeping with mom! He uncovered a secret. Something big. And he's not my brother."

"But Alice said‒"

"Smalls told you that?" Edward shakes his head. "I know it appears that way, but it's not. Emmett is a Cullen, but… It's your dad, Bella. Emmett had been hiding a secret for your dad. I can't tell you anymore."

Images swirl around in my brain in confusion. Emmett's a Cullen, but he's not Edward's brother. My dad is involved. There's a huge secret that caused Esme to fake her death. There was an affair, but it wasn't between Esme and Emmett…

And something about that red Chevy is bothering me.

Whatever's going on is perplexing as hell, and I'm no closer to answers than before.

I don't even know if I want to know, but Edward and I have to get out of here. It's not safe. If dad finds us, we're both dead.

"Where are we running away to this time?" I'm ready, prepared for a life of hiding and secrecy. I'm willing to go wherever he goes, set to disappear into obscurity where no one can find us. As long as we're together, I'll shroud myself in the veil of the night, leaving behind this life not worth living.

Edward doesn't respond.

He's so quick, I can't defend myself to run toward the location in which I came.

A burlap sack is flung around my head, leaving me in complete darkness. I scream out, but I know it's of no use. This is no fairy tale. No one is coming to save me. The happily ever after I'd learned about as a child is crushed when my prince jerks the sack tightly, constricting it around my neck.

As he heaves me over his shoulder, he mumbles words that are as clear as glass.

"I'm sorry, Gill."

* * *

**You guise wanted it, you got it! I think I made it worse, didn't I?**

**MariahajilE- You're the sexiest blueberry muffin I've ever known! Thanks for putting up with me.**

**Readers- you are amazing. Anyone have any theories so far? Please tell me- I'd love to see how wrong you are! haha just kidding! Thanks for reading!**


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

**Flashback:**

"Eight… nine… ten…. Weady or not, hewe I come!"

I squeal in laughter, uncovering my eyes and leaving the home base of Edward's wall to search for him.

He's such a cheater. I'd bet my whole rock collection he's under the bed. I slowly pull up his Power Ranger blankie and peek underneath.

"Gotcha!"

I pout 'cause he's not under there. If he thinks I'm searching this entire mansion, then he can suck my left thumb. There's no way I'm gonna find him on all three floors.

I pull a lollipop from the pocket of my shorts and skip down the hallway. "Eddy! Eddy!"

Edward appears out of nowhere, grabbing my wrist and holding me to his chubby body. "Shhh!"

"Why?" I whisper. We crouch next to his mommy and daddy's bedroom as he stares through the opening.

Edward steals the lollipop from my mouth, savoring the watermelon flavor. "Listen. Do you hear anything?"

I listen carefully, and the only sound that register is moans and growls.

Sounds like someone's being attacked by a bear.

"Oh, no! Is your mommy huwt? We has to help!" I don't want anything to hurt Mrs. Cullen. She's my favoritist second mommy in the whole wide world.

Edward covers my mouth. "No, you idiot. She's having s-e-x."

I'm not sure what that means, but I know it's a bad word. "You not supposed to say bad things, Eddy. I'm telling on you."

"Who you gonna tell, snotball? I double dog dare you to go in there."

As much as I want to tattle, I shake my head. "I'm not going. You go. It's your pawents."

"That's not my dad. He's at work."

I frown and peek through the door again. Mrs. Cullen is wrestling in the bed, making those weird sounds. "Who is it, then?"

Edward shrugs. "I dunno. You think I should call dad? He said to call him if there's an emer-gant-key."

I shake my head. "No, that's tattling, too. She's just playin' with a fwiend."

"Yeah, I guess dad can wrestle too when he gets home. Sounds like fun. Wish Mom would have asked us, too. I'm a great wrestler!"

"Nuh-uh," I joke. "Too slow!" I giggle and run off, ducking in and out of rooms as Edward tries to tag me.

Hours later, when Edward and I are chasing fireflies on the back porch, we catch one in a jar and race to the front of the house.

Daddy is standing on the steps with Mrs. Cullen waving from the doorway.

"Daddy! When did you get here?" I reach my arms up to him as he scoops me in his arms.

"I'm leaving. You ready to go?" I nod, burying my head in the crook of his neck.

"Look what I got, Mr. Swan! It's a firefly!" Edward holds the jar out proudly, showing my daddy our prize.

"Those filthy bugs. What did I tell you about playing with insects, Bella? They carry diseases. C'mon, we need to start walking."

"You not dwive, Daddy?"

He shakes his head. "My car is, uh, up the road a little bit. Say goodbye to Edward. We need to leave."

Scrambling from daddy's arms, I run to Edward to give him a hug goodbye.

"Don't listen to him," Edward whispers in my ear. "Fireflies are awesome."

"Daddy doesn't think so," I reply.

"It's 'cause they're like a secret. No matter how dark it is, they always come out."

* * *

**Do you understand the secret Charlie is hiding?**

**Keep reading! :D**


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty-Two

My muffled cries are quieted as I'm dragged across the grass, over sticks, and up the stairs into a musty building.

"Oh, God! What have you done?" Through the burlap, I hear Esme's strangled voice.

"No one move! No one fucking move!" Edward's warning is heeded as I hear several steps halt in their movement.

"Baby girl, you okay?"

_Dad?_

"Don't you fucking talk to her, you hear me?" Edward fumbles with the sack around my neck. "Bella, I'm going to take this off now. Stay next to me and no one gets hurt."

My eyes flutter, adjusting to the light. I immediately recognize our surroundings. The old barn. The last place I'll ever breathe. The place where I'll die.

I tremble as Edward holds me next to him with a gun pointed toward Esme and my father.

"What are you? Some sort of Casanova? Give me my fucking daughter. She's got nothing to do with this!" Dad bumps his arm against a set of rusted tools hanging on the wall.

"She's got everything to do with this!" Edward bellows, the gun shaking in his hand. "You two better start talking. No more lies."

Dad looks angry, his eyes watering at the position Edward's left him in.

"We have to tell her, Charlie," Esme weeps, grasping his arm. "We can't keep this up. It's over."

I glance from my dad to Esme and back to my dad. The bottomless pit in my stomach begins to collapse. I don't want to hear anything. I want to go home. I want to go back to my room, where it's safe and I can lie on my bed and curl up with a book and pretend that none of this is real.

A place where Esme isn't clutching on to my dad.

Where Edward isn't holding a gun.

Where a red, rusted Chevy isn't parked outside the window.

Where dead bodies aren't popping up out of the woodwork.

Where Emmett isn't slumped in a chair ‒ perfectly alive ‒, staring at me with tears in his eyes.

* * *

**I swear, I'm not pretending to kill off people for no reason. **

**As soon as I peel MariahajilE's body off of the floor from me overworking her, I'll post the ending chaps. **

**Edward's taken Bella in a barn. Everyone is there and Emmett is still alive. **

**Any conspiracies or guesses?**

**Thanks for reading. Will update asap!**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: I usually don't post these in the beginning, but you have to read the final chapters carefully. Slowly. Like a slug in the middle of butt shecks. Otherwise, you'll be crying in a corner yelling how you don't understand. It's complicated like that. Happy reading!**

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Chapter Twenty-Three

"I don't understand!" The tears are flowing down my face. Emmett is still alive! How is this possible? What the hell is going on around here?

"Now!" Edward yells. "Start talking now! You can't protect her anymore!"

"Protect me from what?" I sob through my words, staring at the people around me who are so burdened with keeping secrets that no one wants to be the first to explain. I can't think straight with all of them staring at me.

Esme speaks, her quiet voice unsettling. "You already know, Bella."

I don't know what she's talking about. Why are they staring? Why do they keep looking at me? Why is Edward holding me like this, protecting me, instead of harming me?

"The truck, Bella," Emmett whispers. "You already know. Who does the truck belong to?"

Colors and images rush through my head, each flashing photograph leading to the next.

"No, no, no, no, no..."

* * *

**Flashback:**

"Dad! We're out of orange juice!"

Forks High and its damned algebra. How does it expect me to pass this class? One year left and I'm going down a failure. There's no way I'm going to graduate on time.

"Daddy!"

I shut the refrigerator door and stomp towards the living room. "Dad! Did you not hear me? I'm out for OJ!"

"What?" Dad sips on his Corona, oblivious to my dire situation. He peels his eyes away from the game blaring on the television.

"OJ, Dad. I need my juice." He and I both know its hell around here if I don't get my vitamin C.

"Grab the keys, baby girl." He says it without thought, not remembering what a tragedy the truck is in.

"The brakes. You told me not to drive the truck by myself until the brakes are fixed, remember? Come with me. Plus, you're out of beer."

I finally have his full attention. "Fine. But you're driving. The truck will be fine. Nothing slows down traffic like a cop car."

The keys dangle next to the doorway, on the hook beside our coats we haven't used since winter. I beat him to the truck, climbing into the driver's seat.

"You remember when I bought you this truck?" Dad reminisces, buckling his seatbelt.

I roll my eyes at dad's trip down memory lane. "I remember. Our neighbor, Alfred, brought it over."

"Yes siree. 1953 cherry-painted Chevy. I knew it was too early to buy it. You were what? Six? But I saved it until your 16th birthday. You cried like a little baby."

I laugh. "Only because you let it rot until then. An oil change over the years wouldn't have hurt."

Dad chuckles, and I watch the road, looking out at the gray skies. "You think it's gonna rain?"

"Nah. Weatherman said not until Saturday. Turn here," Dad says pointing to the left. "Blake Street is gonna be full of traffic. Grisley Road is much quicker."

I nod, turning the steering wheel. Dad turns on the radio and dials to country music, some crooner singing about his long lost love.

"Dad, change this crap. He sounds like a cat being strangled."

"It's Johnny Cash. You young kids don't know what real music is these days."

I fumble with the knob as dad tries to beat me to it. We laugh, fighting over which radio station is better when Dad screams.

"BELLA! LOOK OUT!"

* * *

**This is it, guise. 30 Chaps. I'm giving them all to you now.**

**Final reviews? I'd "lub" you forver...**


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty-Four

**Flashback:**

It's too late. The damn brakes on the truck don't stop as a car comes swerving out of nowhere. We collide, sending us spiraling across the road. I bump my head on the steering wheel, and pain shoots through my nose.

"Bella! Bella!" Dad is jostling me, but I'm barely aware of him shaking me. "Baby girl, wake up. Please wake up! Bella!"

He unbuckles my seatbelt, scooting me across the seat.

"Dad?"

"Bella! Git down."

"Dad, what are you doing?" Everything is spinning, and I feel nauseated. Dad climbs over me, taking the driver's seat.

"We have to get out of here! That was Esme's car! We have to get the hell out of here!"

"Dad! No!" I hold my nose with one hand, trying to take the steering wheel with the other. "What if she's hurt? What if Edward or Mr. Cullen is with her? We have to help!"

He drives off, leaving the destruction behind us. "You don't understand, baby girl. You don't understand…"

"Then what?" I cry out. "What is it? What don't I understand?"

He doesn't answer my questions. Instead, he takes a right, driving through a familiar neighborhood. "What are you doing?"

"I left my clothes at the Cullen house. I have to go get them."

"Why? Why are your clothes at their house? Why do you have to get them right now? What is more important than helping Esme?"

"Dammit, Bella! I can't…" Dad is weeping, and for the first time in my life, he looks distraught. The brakes are working just fine as he pulls into the Cullen driveway.

"Esme and I… We've been… She was supposed to bring them back to me tomorrow. If Carlisle finds my clothes…"

Even though blood is gushing from my nose, the pieces of the puzzle start to fit together perfectly. I don't get the chance to respond as dad hops out of the car. He jogs up the stairs to their beautifully adorned house and lifts up the mat. Pulling out a key, he unlocks the door and rushes inside.

I'm caught between hysteria and confusion for the two minutes dad is gone, collecting his evidence. He reappears, tossing his clothes in the bed of the truck.

"How long?" I mumble.

_How long have you been sleeping with my best friend's mom? How long have you kept up this tangle of lies so knotted you will drive away from the scene of an accident so the thread doesn't unravel?_

Dad's voice is so quiet, I barely register his words. "17 years."

It's not even a knot anymore. It's so glued together, it's been fused with cement.

"Esme couldn't just get a divorce?" My voice rises, the anger bellowing from within.

"You think we didn't consider that already? Dammit Bella. We dug ourselves in too deep! Carlisle would never forgive either one of us. I couldn't…we couldn't…"

I shake my head in disgust. I don't know who this man is anymore. He's a fraud, a wolf in sheep's clothing I'm too ashamed to call my own.

"I'm taking you home, Bella," Dad orders. "I need to go back to the accident. You were never there, okay? You act normal. None of this ever happened. Got it?"

I say nothing, staring out the window and silently wishing for rain that never comes.

"Do you hear me, Bella? Do nothing. Say nothing! This. Never. Happened."

Nodding, I remain silent. My muteness is enough to appease him as he drives toward our house, almost pushing me out of the truck. He switches vehicles, climbs into his police car, and drives off.

I go through the motions, unsure of what I'm supposed to be doing. My Algebra homework remains unfinished on the kitchen table. I'm back to square one. I rummage through the refrigerator again, anything to distract from the pain I'm feeling.

Behind leftovers, behind a pot of moldy stew, behind the homemade fish fry is an entire gallon of orange juice.

With the juice in my hand, I block out everything that's transpired and cloud my mind with darkness.

This. Never. Happened.

* * *

**Damn you Charlie Swan. Damn you.**

**Keep reading!**


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter Twenty-Five

**Flashback:**

Dad calls, but his explanations fall on deaf ears.

_He got a cadaver from the morgue._

_He switched the bodies. _

_Burned the vehicle and everything in it._

_It was the perfect opportunity to fix their situation._

_Esme is fine. _

_They can finally be together now._

_No more hiding._

I hang up without a single word being said.

Edward's footsteps are quiet as he enters the kitchen.

"My Mom is dead."

_You're lying. You're lying. You're lying. _

_Not true. Don't say it again. This isn't real. _

_Why the hell are you fucking with me? Don't do that. This isn't happening. Clean up your mess._

_I can't breathe. Stand up already. Why would you say that? Why? Why? Why would you try to make me cry?_

_She's like my own. This isn't real. Take it back._

_I don't believe you. _

_You're lying. You're lying. You're lying._

"I saw who it was, Bella. I know it was an accident. I forgive you."

Edward hugs me tightly, rubbing my hair.

"But your dad won't listen to me. I don't forgive him. This plan will never work. It's fucked up, and it'll never work."

I can barely speak as my knees threaten to buckle from under me.

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**Keep going...**

**Wait! Review...and then...keep going...**


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty-Six

**Flashback:**

"Bella, we have to do something. Look at you. You're falling apart. I hate seeing you like this."

I glare at Emmett, caught between wanting to punch and hug him. "Edward's gonna tell the cops, you know that, right? Not that I blame him…"

I twist the dead dandelion between my fingers, breaking apart the stem.

"I can't let him do that," Emmett replies. "Do you know what kind of shit we'll all be in if he does that? I'm happy with my life. The McCartys are the best thing that have ever happened to me. Your dad and my mom made a mistake, and now I'm the one that's going to pay for it. It took Esme months to convince Carlisle she was raped and she couldn't keep me as a reminder. If Carlisle finds out none of that's true and I'm not his because of an affair…"

He doesn't need to finish his statement. The consequences will be dire, and no one will come out of this unscathed. We'd suffered long enough.

"Edward is biologically the McCarty's son, but I'm thankful Esme paid them off. Now I have the McCartys, and Edward is stuck with Esme for a whore of a mom. Anyways, I just want you to get better, sis. I'll handle this."

"What are you going to do?" I feel empty. It won't matter. I don't care what he does.

_Just leave me alone. _

"Your dad told me to make sure he doesn't talk. If anyone asks you any questions, blame it on Carlisle. I'm pissed at him right now. That fucker told the coach I can't play football anymore 'cause of my knee. Stupid doctor. I don't give a shit. Keep this between us, okay? Pretend this conversation never happened."

I dig a hole, burying the flower in the dirt.

_Block it out._

_Hide the truth._

_Entomb it so deep you don't know it exists._

This. Never. Happened.

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**I don't even know what to say anymore. Cupcake anyone?**


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter Twenty-Seven

**Flashback:**

"Why are you even on the team? You're killing me, Smalls!"

Alice frustrates me to no end. One damn kick. All she had to do was kick the ball one damn time.

I wipe my face with a towel, brewing over our lost soccer game, as I reach for a Gatorade.

"Oh, look. Your boyfriend is coming! What's wrong with his eye?" I glance up to see Edward storming our way.

"I'm gonna do it, Bella!" Edward threatens. "One day I'm gonna do it, and that motherfucker will be sorry he ever laid a hand on me."

I hold the ice to Edward's eye, but there's nothing I can do for his swollen leg. Emmett really messed him up this time. I've done my best to try to stop him, but Emmett cannot be swayed. I don't know how much longer I can take this. Edward is just trying to be honest. He doesn't deserve this torturous blackmail from Emmett.

Edward pulls me to the side, jerking me away from Alice. "Bella, this car crash has gotten way out of hand. You know your dad gave me a crap load of money just to go away? He's trying to pay me off! That piece of shit! He probably stole it from the police station. I swear I'm only putting up with this to protect Mom. Otherwise-"

I tremble beneath Edward's glare.

"You need to fix this, Bella. Tell your dad to come clean and get Emmett off my back. I mean it."

All I can do is fixate on the mud on my cleats.

Looking back, I should have said something.

That ice was just a Band-Aid on a gaping wound.

But wounds heal.

Almost as if they had never happened.

* * *

**I'm only here for Smalls. Just so ya know.**


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty-Eight

**Flashback (Night of the Murder):**

"You got the money?" Emmett asks Edward.

Edward opens up the bag so wide, a few hundred dollar bills fall out. "I have the money, Meatball. All you need to worry about is lying still and not breathing."

"You're talking to the previous captain of the swim team. I can hold my breath. Tell princess over here to start wiping the blood everywhere."

I freeze, not wanting to touch the blood we stole from the hospital.

"C'mon, Bella. We don't have all night," Edward complains.

We spray the blood, covering the walls and the carpet. Edward strategically creates stab marks on Emmett, cutting his shirt in random places and using cornstarch, baking powder, and the blood to mimic lacerations.

I begin to feel woozy from the smell of the blood.

"Stay with me, Bella," Edward says, holding me upright. "You can't keep blacking out on us."

"She's sick, Edward. Cut her a break. It'd be too much for anyone."

Edward kisses my forehead. "Sorry. We just need to be careful. This isn't gonna work if you can't handle it."

I nod, trying to gather myself together. We've come this far, this close.

I can't allow the depression to sink back in.

Now's the time to set everything straight.

"Remember," Edward says, looking between Emmett and me. "Stick to the plan. Carlisle will switch the bodies when he gets a chance."

"Wait!" Emmett interrupts. "Did anybody pay off the damn coroner?"

"Dad's already taken care of it," Edward explains. "I got your truck out of the shop, Bella, so it's already parked. Go home and get your bag ready. Emmett, try not to fuck this up. Felix's cabin is several hours away, so Carlisle and Emmett will meet us there when shit has calmed down."

"Is everybody ready?"

Carlisle nods from the doorway. "Looks great, kids."

When Edward finally forgave Emmett, we sat down and told Carlisle the truth.

Turns out, adults are much better at hatching up plans.

With Emmett in position, I climb out of the window, holding on to the rickety ladder.

We're finally doing it.

I can't believe this is happening.

* * *

**Did anyone see this coming? Anyone? No?**

**I'm a failure...**


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter Twenty-Nine

**Flashback:**

It's never occurred to me how fireflies light up the sky at night.

I admire their fluttering wings and illuminating bodies as I sneak a cigarette on our old, rickety porch. I have about five minutes until Edward arrives, so I puff a few more times until I can no longer inhale the nicotine.

I'm so nervous about our plan, I stand up too fast, twisting my ankle on the highest step.

My head bumps against the porch, sending me falling onto the ground.

There's darkness swirling around me, attempting to pull me into its depth.

I struggle to wake up, to come out of my dizzying state.

When I come to, I try to steady myself, holding on to the decomposing railing.

Something's wrong. I feel like I should be doing something. Going somewhere. A cigarette lies on the ground, with smoke lingering in the air. I rub my head and debate going back inside the house.

I don't feel like myself. Maybe I need to sit down, retrace my steps before the fall.

But in life, there are no do-overs.

Just the haunting image of Edward Cullen running toward me, his white shirt torn and bloodied to hell.

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**Annnnnnd we're back to chapter one.**

**One more, and that's all folks!**


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

I slump to the ground of the barn, every pair of eyes on me.

Edward attempts to lift up the dead weight of my body while still pointing his gun.

"Carlisle!"

Edward's father appears from behind me, hoisting me into his arms. "It's okay, Bella. I know this is hard to understand, but you've just had a mild case of amnesia. It's going to be okay. Just remember we're here for you."

"This is how it's going to go down," Edward orders maliciously. "Emmett, Dad, Bella, and I are going to get the hell out of here. You two fuckers can stay here and think about this huge mess you've made. You've done nothing but hurt everyone around you, especially Bella. We would have been long gone if it weren't for Uncle Felix telling you about our hideaway house. You shouldn't have come for us, Charlie. You should have let us leave the first time."

"Edward-" My dad steps forward, trying to reason with him.

"Shut the hell up, Charlie! I've been through hell and back," Edward says bitterly. "Dad had to sneak me out of jail while you were trying to put me away for life! I don't want to hear any of it. Fuck the both of you. You two had this affair, and you'll have to die because of it. Come on, Emmett. Let's get the hell out of here."

"Baby girl?"

Dad's voice cries behind me, pleading for forgiveness.

I have none to give; no mercy for the man who held me bondage because of his fabricated treachery.

I shake my head as tears stream down my face. Releasing myself from Carlisle's hold, I confront my father.

"You once told me fireflies were filthy insects, Daddy. You're wrong. They're beautiful. They're just like secrets. No matter how dark it is, they always come out."

I point to Emmett, the product of their affair.

"Emmett is 17 years old. That's 17 years of lies. 17 birthdays you missed. 17 times you could have told the truth. But you didn't."

I toss Dad a mason jar with glowing fireflies.

"Better start counting," I warn.

"You've got 17 seconds."

We walk out simultaneously as Edward locks the door behind us, dousing the barn with gasoline.

I ignore every scream and pound on the door as police sirens wail in the distance.

Emmett flicks a lighter, tossing it behind him.

The barn explodes into flames, illuminating the night sky.

I finally felt free.

Emmett chuckles as Edward tosses the burlap sack into the burning fire. "Went a little dramatic with the whole kidnapping thing, don't you think?"

Edward grins down at me. "Shut up, Meatball! I had to. Bella was so confused, she would have never followed me into the barn. She would have blacked out before anyone had a chance to talk."

"Hey!" I say, shoving him into his shoulder. "Give me a little credit. Amnesia is a horrible condition. It affects thousands of people every-"

Emmett and Edward don't even give me the courtesy to justify myself as they stare at each other before bursting into laughter.

"So, where are we headed kids?" Carlisle asks, as we climb into my red Chevy.

I smile, kissing Edward on the lips as Emmett tosses bills into the air.

"How about Florida? I hear they have great citrus fruit."

Edward frowns at my suggestion. "Seriously Gill? We can go anywhere in the world and you want to go to Florida?"

I shrug and snuggle underneath his arm.

"What can I say? I'm in the mood for orange juice."

****The End****

* * *

**That's it. Hope you enjoyed!**

**Thanks to MariahajilE for being the best damn Muffin Beta that ever lived. **

**To the readers: Your words aspired me to keep going with this little story. It was crazy, I know, but I hope you enjoyed the ride as much as I did.**

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**Love you all, and thanks for reading!**


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